They say when life gives you lemons make lemonade, but what happens when you feel like what your selling is more Asda own brand then Schweppes? In an age of social media when it seems like every other person is getting a promotion, #girlboss - ing it and living their best life it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself. For me this has led to a case of imposter syndrome on more than a couple of occasions.

Speaking from my own experiences this comes up most in a working environment and has led to me feeling like I’m unworthy of the position I’m in or afraid to ask for more. Whether that’s asking for a higher salary or a promotion, to doubting my own ability to work on a task, it can be severely disabling and massively knock your confidence and self belief. This comes into play for me both with blogging and with my freelance work, as both mean being able to sell yourself and your skill set to people who may have never heard of you before, which to be quite honest can be terrifying when your livelihood and ability to pay your bills depends on it.

Outfit: Lemon Print Dress from H&M 

Its all too easy to find myself in a downward spiral of negativity, questions like “Am I good enough? Can I really do what I’m saying I can? What if they don’t like it? What if it doesn’t work out?” buzz through my brain at break neck speed. In my worst moments I just sit staring at my screen having an internal freak out doing absolutely nothing productive at all, slowly convincing myself it is all going to go horribly wrong and I’ll be found out as the fraud that I am.

In moments like this it is important to take a step back, to actually stand up and step away from the computer. Make a cup of tea, put on your favourite song, WhatsApp your best mate, literally anything to remove yourself from that space both mentally and physically. I find it really helpful to take five minutes out when things get too much and physically go and do something else however menial it might be. When things get overwhelming I like to grab a pen and paper and actually write down the points of what is happening and am often surprised how much more manageable the task at hand feels from doing this. My next step is to think of the last time someone paid me a professional compliment, even a simple “thanks for your help on this” will do, building myself up to the things I’m really proud of over my career to remind myself that actually, I can do this and I can do it bloody well when I put my mind to it.

On my best days I find myself wondering why I ever felt down on my self in the first place, I’ve not come up with the answer to this just yet however I think being somebody who doesn’t much like to toot their own horn comes into it a lot because after all nobody likes a show off. There is however a very distinguishable line between being a show off and having some solid self belief and it’s one I’m trying to work my way up to. When things do go well I have a tendency to react with the phrase “I can’t believe this has happened” which I am now trying hard to replace with “Wow, I made this happen” instead whenever I catch myself saying it. Even if you don’t believe it at first, repeating self praise and being proud of your achievements is a great affirming tool and like anything in life the more you do it, the easier it becomes.

Sometimes it seems like it is a scary world out there, and having little wobbles of self belief is going to happen from time to time. For me it often takes the words of someone else telling me that actually I am kick ass at what I do for me to believe it. Just last week I got turned down from a second stage interview because I didn’t have enough experience and it wasn’t until I was telling my friends about a few days later and they hit with me the reply “but you’ve been doing this since influencer marketing was a thing” for me to really feel ok about it and have a laugh. Knock backs happen but it’s how you deal with it that matters most.

And if all else fails? In the words of Alex Turner, “You’re rarer than a can of dandelion and burdock, all those other girls are just postmix lemonade”.